Scientists have reported strange activity within the night sky, and no, it's not aliens this time!
According to studies published by Senior Researcher Jonathon Snotgrass, at the Astral Branch of the Institution of Science, stars have been "blinking out", which he describes as the burning balls of gas ceasing to exist. This is in direct violation of Felix’s Nth law; mass can neither be created nor destroyed, although it may be rearranged in space. Snotgrass reports, "This is vary unusual, and highly exciting! I mean, the last time a "rule of the universe" got broken, the title of the new rule went to the researcher who realised such! I’m so excited to get to work on this!" He then cut himself off with an elongated high-pitched squealing noise of excitement.
Unfortunately, this discovery might not be as exciting as it seems. Our "Friends In The Sky" seem rather displeased with this, as this unprecedented activity is interfering with their navigational systems. These frustrations could lead to interplanetary frustrations rising- only further complicating the inter-coalition tensions that are on the rise. In lighter news, Dr. Snotgrass says he will be celebrating this discovery with his husband, Dr. Alex Sovich-Snotgrass, as they navigate their respective scientific fields.
Published 2 Months Ago
Looking at the night sky will only bring unanswerable questions- Do not search for what cannot be known.
There has been a concerning update on the previously reported "Vanishing Cosmos". According to stressed Senior Researcher Jonathon Snotgrass, this phenomena affects almost all recorded stars, including the most recently discovered Excelsa Star System, and there is no doubt it reaches to all undiscovered stars as well. Snotgrass' previous findings can be found Here. When I spoke to him, he expanded with the information he’s recently discovered;
"It’s not just that the stars are ceasing to exist, n-no, it's incredibly strange, perplexing, (Snotgrass mutters unintelligibly to himself), They seem to be going through their entire life cycles in the span of seconds! Seconds, s-seconds, Seconds! A-and as you might imagine, the effects of the immense Radia Aura that that should be producing would be absolutely devastating, but no! It SHOULD be happening, it WOULD be killing us- (Snotgrass gives a little sob before resuming with the same intensity,) and not-only that! T-the blueshifts and the redshifts turn purple as if spinning in place, and god, gods or whatever cruel scientist is using us an experiment plays with my psyche like a cat and a string i-"
Snotgrass was then cut off by his husband ushering him out of the lab. Attempts to interview Dr. Sovich-Snotgrass yielded the following information: Snotgrass had not left the lab in numerous days, Somehow managing to keep up with his physical needs while neglecting his mental health. Sovich-Snotgrass reports that he has placed his husband on forced sabbatical, and will take care of him until he is recovered.
In the meantime, we cannot do anything but turn our heads down, and hope while we wait for a response to our silent questions.
Published 1 Month Ago
All has gone dark in the night. It is time to say goodbye to the light. Say goodnight.
There are no more distant lights in the sky. All has gone dark, and has been for two nights now. We have no contacts remaining at the Astral Branch of the Institution of Science, and therefore, no information to share. No word from our friends in the sky, as it's most likely they cannot even reach us. Stay safe, stay sane.
Published 3 Days Ago